So... A few things.

1. I’m not “not playing” because I don’t want to meet new people. (and at this point, because I went to practice today, I suppose that I’m not even not playing… aka I am playing) My reasoning for wanting to take a break from ultimate (come on guys this is me we are talking about and you all know I could never quit for good) is that I need to learn what else there is to who I am. All I have been for so long, and all I know how to be is ultimate Frisbee. Every time I do anything, my first thought is always, “How will this affect me playing ultimate.” I put more of myself into this one thing than I do in school, my family and everything else in my life. It is my temptation and I always give in. It is my selfish addiction. The only problem is it is the one thing that makes me truly happy. So now I feel like I need to find a balance between the two.
2.Greg,
I am not naïve enough to think that I am the only one that misses my friends and family or that I can escape the effects of change. Change is the only thing in life that I trust. I am not feeling sorry for myself, that wasn’t the purpose of that post, so please give me a little credit and take it a little easy. Next time ask, don’t assume. The reason that I put up that post was that I wanted to show some gratitude for the family that I have that I love, while in my own simple way letting go. That doesn’t mean that they aren’t going to be a part of my life, it simply means that I accept that I can no longer be a part of that team but am grateful none the less of what it has meant for me. I felt somewhat as a traitor in going playing on a new team and felt like I needed to express my sentiments. Consider it a goodbye of sorts. I explained previously why I wanted to not play for a while, and hope that that explanation will suffice. If not, you know where I live, and we can talk. This is stupid to do over the internet when we are two minutes apart.
3. Luke,
I am going to quote myself for you… “ I know this is childish” I know that not wanting to meet new people is selfish. I know. Here is the catch; I said I didn’t want to, not that I wasn’t going to. Again, I am not so naïve as to think that the people that I meet in my life aren’t sent there for a reason. It wasn’t even that I necessarily didn’t want to meet new people, but rather that I didn’t want to replace those girls that have meant so much. In a small and yes childish way, that is sort of how I felt. Please note the past tense.

4. Kathy,
Thank you. Maybe it is the mom in you but thanks all the same.
5. Emma,
You are right about there being a time for everything. I admire that outlook.
6. I am not that great of a gift. In all honesty. You can trust me on that.
7. I was vulnerable with someone once, and then another person a separate time. Neither got me anywhere, except somewhere I didn't want to be.
8. Julia,
You are profound in your caring, wisdom, beauty, outlook, and attitude. Thank you for never judging but always just being there. Even when you don’t agree with me.